Lead me Home
by shakeahand55
Summary: “Goodbye, sweet world of sorrow, my new life, begins with death.”


Title: Lead me Home

Author: shakeahand55

Summary: "Goodbye, sweet world of sorrow, my new life, begins with death."

Disclaimer: I don't own them or the song, Lead me Home by Jamey Johnson!

AN: I can't remember if Christina ever mentioned her family, but for the sake of this I'm saying that she doesn't have any blood family left and no boyfriend, no real life out of work and just mostly the other ADA's and Jim and Alex for friends.

* * *

She looked up at the ceiling as the tears rolled from her already red eyes and down her already puffy checks, but she tried to stop her self from crying.

What was the point in crying her eyes out when she knew it would be over soon, and she didn't even loss her hair like that woman across the hall from her, so she shouldn't be crying.

She sighed sadly as she turned her head to watch as her nurse left the room after settling her back into her bed.

Her treatment done for the day, until tomorrow, that was another day which meant another try at a useless treatment.

_I have seen my last tomorrow;  
I am holding my last breath,_

She couldn't take it any more, she lived with the same routine everyday for the passed 3 months, and it never hurt any less or helped her get better or make the pain go away.

As the days and treatment went on she never got any better, but she smiled, her pain was going to end tonight so she would never get her next treatment.

_Goodbye, sweet world of sorrow,  
My new life, begins with death. _

But she still couldn't understand how other people, the survivors made it through all this.

But then she remembered they had some one to help them through it, they had something to fight for, like their family or a lover but she had no one.

She wiped her tears away from her face, being careful not to jar the IV in her hand, because that was a lie.

She had her friends, her co-workers, they were like her family, but they weren't her real family she didn't have any real blood family.

She didn't even have a boyfriend or lover, someone she could talk to, someone who would know all her deep dark secrets, she had no one.

_I am standing on the mountain;  
I can hear the angel's songs,_

She knew she was going to die today any way because when she fell asleep last night she had seen one of her childhood friends, who had drowned when she was 14, in her dream.

She told her she'd be waiting for her tonight on the other side, waiting for her to cross over into the light so they could be together again, so they both wouldn't be lonely any longer.

_I am reaching over Jordon,  
Take my hand, Lord lead me home._

She wasn't going to tell any one about her dream, because she knew they would just think it was the crazy talk of a terminally ill woman.

But she knew what she heard in her dream last night was the truth, and she wasn't going to fear it, for her death was the beginning of her new life.

_All my burdens, are behind me, _

She may not have actually had a lot of burdens like other people, but what she did have stressed her out and made her depressed a lot of the times.

But she hid it around everyone so they never knew how depressed she was about everything, just helping to add to her stress, it was just another burden for her to carry.

But when she was gone, she wouldn't have anything to bug her, anything to worry about, she would leave it all behind, and that made her smile, she would be burden free once and for all.

_I have prayed, my final pray,_

She wasn't a religious person, but after hard cases or when she felt like she was totally going to lose it she'd pray, pray for it to not bug her anymore, pray for the hurting to end.

She finally understood how you could pray and still not be religious, because right now she just finished her last prayer, for life to be good for the one's she'll leave behind, for her friends when she's gone.

_Don't you cry, over my body,_

She said good bye to her friends that night knowing it would be the last time she would see them, her pain slowly slipping away as she closed her eyes to fall asleep, she knew she wouldn't wake up.

She wished they would understand come tomorrow and at her funeral, it may be her body laying there but it wouldn't be **HER**, she would be gone long before tomorrow morning, she would be with her friend, she would be at Home before midnight.

It was late afternoon the next day, with all her friends by her side when she was pounced dead, on Friday, November, 2nd, 2006 at 5:27pm.

_Cause that ain't me, lying there._

Her funeral was held at a small church 2 days later; her body lay in the center of the large room in a light oak coffin in one of her best suites, her red hair fanned out nicely beneath her on the pillow her head laid upon.

"She looks so at peace laying there" they would say as they wiped there tears, only for more to fall in there place as they stood over her saying there good byes before the preacher started to talk.

_No, I am standing on the mountain,  
I can hear the angel's songs,_

She was at peace, she was happy and she wasn't in pain any more, and she looked the best she had for a long time, she looked just like she was sleeping.

_I am reaching over Jordon,  
Take my hand, Lord lead me home._

The funeral was small as she didn't know a lot of people, so Brian was the one who spoke about her, telling all in the room how she was funny, smart, caring and loveable.

_I am standing on the mountain,  
I can hear the angels songs,  
I am reaching over Jordon,_

Also how he would miss her, and how she was loved by everyone, so she would be greatly missed by everyone in that room now that she was gone for good.

_Take my hand, Lord lead me home._

When she was laid to rest, her stone already engraved and dated but without the date of her death as that was still to be put on, the sun came out from behind the clouds and a rainbow appeared as the rain stopped falling.

Christina was where she belonged now, she was with her friend, she was in heaven, and she was at Home now for the rest of eternity.

_Take my hand, Lord lead me home. _

She was in peace and always would be, and she was waiting for the day when all her friends joined her, years from now at Home in heaven.


End file.
